Gareth's Story of Rixon's mum, Bec: Love and Loss

My name is Gareth, this is Rixon and this is our story.

 

Life into parenthood was not an easy straightforward road, one that could have never been made without Bec (my wife and Rixon’s mum).

 

Starting a family was never going to be straight forward for us. We went into our relationship knowing that because of Bec’s Cystic Fibrosis that it was a real possibility we wouldn’t be able to start our own family. 

 

 

One of Bec’s lifelong friends Jess saw Bec’s struggles with this decision and made the incredibly selfless offer to be our surrogate. After realising that this could become a reality we began the long process, creating embryos, completing legal documents and seeing counsellors.

 

 

We could not believe our luck when the IVF was successful after just this first attempt. In that moment, we felt on top of the world, like our dreams had been realised and like nothing could stop us from finally starting our own little family. That was until around halfway through the pregnancy Bec’s health started to deteriorate rapidly and the unimaginable happened, she passed away from CF.

 

 

On January 20, our son Rixon made his entrance into the world, with me in the room to be the first to hold him and to cut his cord. The first thing I noticed about Rixon was that he has his Mum’s eyes, and although I wanted nothing more than for Bec to be there sharing in that moment with me, I was so grateful that she had given me the gift of becoming a dad. I knew it wasn’t going to be an easy job raising a son on my own, but the joy I got from knowing that there was a living, breathing piece of Bec in this world again would make all the sleepless nights worth it.

 

 

Rixon is now 5 and each Mother’s Day Rixon and I celebrate the life of Bec by going to our special place, having a picnic and I share with him all the great memories and photos of her. Mother’s Day to us is a very special and emotion day that we will cherish forever, Rixon really looks up to her and takes after her in a lot of ways, He is a very smart, artistic and determined just like she was and this Mothers May he has some beautiful new jewellery from the team at Francesca to remember her by. On his pendant we got “you got this” engraved, that was a phrase that a lot of Bec’s closest friends would say to her whenever things weren’t going great, and I have continued it with Rixon.  

 

Bec lived her life not letting CF impact on her opportunities and endeavours, she was a high achiever at school and university, and always approached life with joy and positivity. She was the most caring and supportive person towards everyone and everything, especially the countless homeless cats and dogs that she would bring home.

 

I imagine if Bec were here today to see Rixon she would be the most amazing, caring and hands on mother, she would have loved to share her love for art and animals with him and most of all she would be very proud of the little boy he had become.

 

Happy Mother’s day Bec, we love you. 

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